Life Lately...

Thank you all for the positive response from my last post. It is such a hard thing to talk about sometimes and if I can help one person feel like they are not alone then that is great. I want to do a post on pumping tips soon as well, stay tuned....
Oh life lately has definitely been interesting. It is getting easier with a new baby in the house, but we are still wondering how to juggle it all. On top of the new baby we are still living with Tim's parents. It is tough at times because we do not have our own space or just alone times. we can do anything for a few months and plus they are a big help with Owen and Mason.
I cannot believe it has been a whole month since we welcomed Owen into our family. He is growing like a weed. At his doctor's appointment yesterday we learned he gained almost 2 pounds in two weeks. He does love to eat, but he does not look chunky. He is healthy and growing well we were told.
He is more alert it seems lately and he is moving his arms more. I need to get Mason's baby book out of the box it is packed in to see what he was doing at a month and other milestones.

Mason is a good big brother, but he tends to be a little rough at times and loud. I am pretty sure that Owen will be able to sleep through anything when he is older. Mason goes to daycare 2 days a week to keep up his routine and keep going to preschool. This has been a big help to me because I get a day with just Owen and I can get stuff done.
I have to go back to work in two weeks. I go back on Halloween so we do not have to worry about Tim going to work too. November 2nd will be our first day with us both going to work and daycare in the mix. It will definitely be interesting, but we can do it. I am sure it will get easier with time.

I am ready to go back to work, as odd as that sounds coming from a mom with a newborn. I enjoy work and I enjoy my alone time. I have an amazing daycare that I trust and feel good about sending Owen there. Mason has been going to the same place since he was 6 weeks old and we have really liked the center from day 1.
Our house is coming along. We should have foundation walls next week. Tim has been busy working on building a shed for his tractor and lawn mower to go in over the winter. I think I am more anxious now that the work has started than I was waiting for the bank to clear us to close on the loan.
This is me lately... yoga pants, t-shirt, messy hair, and a child in my arms. Mason actually took this photo. It is now time to try to get boy #1 down for a nap, while boy #2 is already sleeping. Wish me luck.

Ok Who has tips for getting two kids out of the house in the morning? We have to leave the house by 5, yes 5 a.m. - eek!

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The Decision...

I have made the decision to exclusively pump breast milk.

Throughout this pregnancy I said that I would attempt breast feeding again. I told my mom and others that seemed to be pushing it when Mason was born that I would attempt it, but I did not want to feel pressured. I think that society, the nurses at the hospital, family, friends, etc. put a lot of pressure on new moms to breast feed. I felt a lot of pressure when I had Mason and it caused a few breakdowns in the middle of the night. Tim finally told me that I needed to do what made me happy and sane and not worry about what others thought. Some people are meant to breastfeed and for some it is just not meant to be.

When Mason was a baby he had tongue tie that was not found until he was a couple weeks old so I contributed that to a lot of my breastfeeding problems. Owen was checked in the hospital for it and he does not have it.

As soon as Owen was placed on my chest I decided that I would give it a try again. I spoke to the lactation consultant at the hospital and got tips and got some good advice. I started off strong, but I ended up breastfeeding for 5 days. I was in pain and Owen seemed to be up all night long. Tim said it would be nice to know how much Owen was eating so we knew if he was getting enough and we had no way of telling when I was breastfeeding. I also did not like having my shirt half off for most of the day.

When we went for the first check up a couple days after coming home from the hospital I talked to the doctor about it. I could not find the words to ask about formula and just pumping, but she managed to find them for me. "You are just not cut out for breastfeeding." Yes! that is exactly it! I am not a fan, I just do not like it. I respect woman who do it for months and months and even over the year mark, but it is not for me and that is ok.

I do not feel bad that I am not actually breastfeeding. I am pumping and that it just as good. The doctor said that she would rank pumping to feed as 3rd on a scale of what is easiest when it comes to feeding - breastfeeding being number 1 and formula feeding number 2.

I pumped milk for Mason and I am doing it for Owen. I want to try to do it until the new year at least. It saves money and it is good for him to get my milk. I pump every 3-4 hours and I am making sure I am getting in all the water I can during the day.

I know how I felt when I was debating the breastfeeding vs pumping issue when I had Mason and I think that a lot of women may suffer from depression because of it. I know that I felt close to depression when I was feeling like a terrible mom for not wanting to breastfeed and not feeling like I could do it.

It is ok, not everyone is cut out for breastfeeding. There is nothing wrong with using formula or exclusively pumping. Your baby is going to get the nutrients he/she needs either way.

Did you have a tough time breast feeding? Did you feel pressured to continue? 

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